Tuesday, November 29, 2011

December Riddles

Q.  What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A.   A puddle!

Q.  How do snowmen greet each other?
A.  Ice to meet you!

Q.  Where does a snowman keep his money?  
A. In a snow bank

Q.  Where does a snowman get his information?
 A.  The winternet

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a shark?  
A. Frostbite.

Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?  
A.  Frosted flakes 

Q.  What do you call an old snowman?  
A.  Water

Q: What do lady snowmen use to stay young looking?
A: Cold cream.

QWhat happened when the snowwoman got angry at the snowman?
A.   She gave him the cold shoulder.

Q. What do snowmen wear on their heads?
A. Ice caps.

Q. What is a snowman's favorite lunch?
A. An iceberger with a bowl of chili! 

Q. What do you call a snowman party?
A.  A Snowball! 

Q: How do you know if there's a snowman in your bed?
A: You wake up wet!

Q.  What did the guests sing at the snowman's party?
A.  Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow

Q.  Why did Frosty go to live in the middle of the ocean?
A.  Because snow man is an island.

Q.  Why did Frosty the Snowman want a divorce? 
A.  Because he thought his wife was a flake

Q. How does Snowman get to work?  
A. On an icicle.

Q.  What do snowmen call their offspring?
A.  Chill-dren

Q.  What do you call a snowman walking through a jungle?
A.  Lost

Monday, November 7, 2011

Accidental Turkeys

Oops!  I accidentally posted this!  Oh, well....I've been adding a riddle/joke-a-day in November (except for weekends) on my facebook page. I was going to save them up until Thanksgiving week and post them all at once here...Oh, well.  I guess I'll just keep adding.'em until I run out.
Happy Thanksgiving, Friends & Family!

Q:  If twenty thanksgiving turkeys told terrible tales, how many "t's" would there be in all?  A:  If you said "7" you'd be wrong.  There are NO "t's" in the word "all"

Q:  What do you get if you have Broomhilda on a beach with a turkey?  A:  A turkey sand-wich.

Q:  Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk? A. To hatchet.

Q:  If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one? A: Goblet.

Q:  What happened to the turkey who got into a fight? A. He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

Q:  Why did the turkey stuffing go on strike? Because it wanted  a better celery

Q:  How do you send a turkey through the post office?  A.  Bird Class mail

Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey?  A: Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!!

Q.: What happened to the turkey whose feathers were all pointing the wrong way? A. He was tickled to death.

Q:   What happened to the turkey that was shot at by an Indian?  A. It had an arrow escape.

Q: Why did the turkey go to the movie? A. To see Gregory Peck (You'd probably need a little age on you to "get" this one.) 
Q: What sound does a turkey's phone make?  A: Wing! Wing!
Q.  Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?  A.  Yes - a building can't jump at all
Q. What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? A. If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy! 
Q.  What do you call a bunch of turkeys playing turkey?  A.  Fowl play
Q. Why didn't the turkey eat dessert?  A. He was stuffed!  
Q.  What sound does a space turkey make?  A.  "Hubble, hubble, hubble."
Q: Did the little Pilgrims eat their turkey with their fingers? A: No, they never ate their fingers!How do 
Q: How do you keep a turkey in suspense?  A:  I'll tell you at Christmas.